Red Colony 3 (Nintendo Switch) Review

No. This isn't really a big improvement on what came before. Red Colony 3 is better than Red Colony 2, the same way Red Colony 2 was better than Red Colony: just a little. More specifically, while previous instalments where all about simplistic pointing and shooting, this goes a bit further, letting the new protagonist, the sexy, big-bosomed droid named Mina, aim at various directions, with some of her enemies having weak spots that must be hit in order for them to go down. There are also a couple of occasions where a stealthier approach is recommended, which in practice means disabling lights, or being silent. Other than that, this remains one more generic survival horror experience, where you need to explore around, find key items that will enable delving a bit deeper, solve minor puzzles (with clues usually a few steps away), and, finally, gather resources, like ammo and so on.

Those who've played any of the previous entries, of course, know already that this isn't really about the gameplay. This remains the same, oversimplified, and uber-short kind of deal. Moreover, it still lacks a decent balancing when it comes to weapon damage and is once more in need of some polishing here and there. Visual/animation glitches, a variety of script bugs, with one in particular throwing an endless supply of enemies at you, and so on. The developer even makes some self-parodying humour, by having Mina discover that destroyed lightbulbs return back to normal by an employee, and "not because of bad coding."

Now, the concept is pretty neat. Mina, basically being a robotic drone working for a certain queen, is tasked with returning to the planet of Titan, where she will be awarded with the so-called 'Turn,' where she will finally gain her own free will and learn what love means. Things get a turn for the worse, however, as the populace blames her for their queen's mysterious death, as well as the undead and reptilian monsters (or undead reptilian monsters) than now roam the streets. That being said, don't expect a particularly strong narrative, great writing, and deep character development. The pleasure here is, once again, the strong smell of corn. This sexploitation-esque blend of all things sci-fi/horror knows darn well that it's silly and takes great joy in that fact.

This is a fanservice game. There's no point hiding it. It's not really about titillation, though. Unless a teen, where hormones are God, seeing an overflowing set of breasts swinging around will most likely make you laugh here. Red Colony 3 makes the correct choice, and incorporates that "joke" into the game itself, by having mina, say, find a saw to cut the bars that block her impressive boobage to fit through a passage. Take that Resident Evil and Silent hill games! What's more impressive than the aforementioned boobage is how "unfair" the story feels, if that makes any sense. The writing is straight up b-movie laughable garbage and crazy exposition, but the atmosphere of it all is actually very bleak, the world post-apocalyptic-looking, the characters far from likeable, and the outcome, like in all entries so far, nihilistic and far from rewarding. It's a weird blend of silly fanservice and overall darkness that just… works.

At the end of the day, review scores and all that baggage put aside, this is… well, a Red Colony game, and as such, it's not really something that's easy to recommend to just anyone. The survival horror gameplay is too simple, and mostly caters to ultra-casual players; the story is… tolerable; the animation stiff and far from lifelike; and the visuals, while charming in a way, are clearly not wallpaper-worthy material. This critic knows very well that this isn't a good game - but he still likes it!

Red Colony 3, is by all means the definition of niche and cult. It has that "so bad it's good" magic that b-movie afficionados know all too well. In other words, it's hard to say whether you'll like it or not. Buy the first one (usually at the price of a pizza), and if you find it fun, purchase the rest as well. Every single one is relatively cheap, short (and therefore never turn into a chore), and equally corny.